My Voice - Crazy Committed

Committed is a word that can have a couple of meanings. Like, "I am committed to this marriage and will never leave my wife." Or, "I think I am Napoleon and I am committed to the Behavioral Health ward for evaluation." One definition has sign of certainty, stability, unwavering actions. The other definition connotes "crazy". You know, I am finding that being committed to following Jesus-- living in a manner that reflects Him more than the prevailing culture, loving the least instead of sucking up the the best--makes me feel the tension between these two definitions. I feel unwavering commitment to pursue Jesus everyday -- and I feel like others think I should be "crazy" committed to some state facility.

I spent several years in a successful career as an officer in the Air Force. I spent days working for some the most powerful people in the world, including have direct connection to the Clinton Administration. Now, each week, I spend days eating a meal with Chico's homeless, sleeping on the ground with Chico's struggling teenagers, managing a messy collection of people in recovery, young adults and people who are as "committed" as I--please see the double meaning. Somedays, I wonder, "maybe I should be committed."

Then, I read stories of Jesus, and His struggle with the prevailing religious culture. He said crazy things, like, "foxes have dens, birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no where to lay His head." Jesus lived homeless. He said, "If you want to find your life, you have to lose it." Jesus encouraged you to see the extreme cost of following Him. He said things like, "Don't take the seat of honor, but take the seat of the least...". Jesus seemed to tell people that it's ok to fall off the ladder of success, to quit fighting to "be somebody" and become a servant, take on the role of the least, lose yourself and live unencumbered and along the way, you just might find True life. The most committed example of pursuing God's will was a man many thought should be "committed." Why? Because Jesus' commitment to God separated Him from the values of the culture and it looked crazy different. As we commit our lives to follow Jesus, aren't we going to look crazy different too? A life committed to following the steps of Jesus is going to look starkly different than the cultural norms. I believe that is where we are called to live. Let's get "crazy committed" to Jesus!

PS - I have been thinking about this since last fall when I read, "In His Steps" by Charles Shelton, written in the 1890s about a community that lives like they believe Jesus would and look strikingly different than their culture. "In His Steps" is now public domain and can be read here: http://www.ssnet.org/bsc/ihs/ihs.html or purchased at Amazon.com.

My Voice - Greatness

What defines greatness? Muhammad Ali self-proclaimed, "I am the greatest!" Michael Jordan and Joe Montana are considered "the greatest" in their respective sports. Why? Because they won a lot more than they lost and led those winning teams with their talent and personality. The Beatles were once called, "the greatest musical act that will ever grace a stage." Winning, success and popularity seem to define greatness in modern culture.

Yesterday, I read Psalm 104 that talks about the "greatness" of God. It says, "Oh Lord, My God, how Great You are. You are robed with honor and majesty. You are dressed in a robe of light and you stretch out a curtain of the starry skies....You placed the earth on its foundations so it would never be moved." The Psalmist continues for 35 verses describing the creative "greatness" of God. 1 Chronicles 29 says, "Yours, O Lord, is the greatness, the power, the glory, the victory and the majesty. Everything in heaven and earth is yours...." King David proclaims that there is a "Royal Greatness" to God that diminishes all other leaders in comparison. Psalm 79 says, "Your people will praise your greatness from generation to generation to generation." The greatness of God is not temporary, but eternal and unchanging.

So what? Well, for a lot of my life, I have tried to be great. I have wanted to be able to say, " I am the greatest." I have wanted to play the role of Michael Jordan in every situation. But recently, I've been learning that God is great and my role in life is to proclaim the "He is the greatest and He lets me play on His team." God is the Creator, the Eternal King, The Answer. I get to play the role of Harris Barton (an offensive lineman for the 49ers), who said, "Joe Montana is cool... He is the greatest. I do my part, so Joe can be great." Well, God is the Greatest and I want to do my part, so others see that God is Great!

So, today, I am spending the next 15 minutes being reminded of "How Great our is our God". You should join me and celebrate the greatness of God.

My Voice - What if...

"If" can be a dangerous word and "what if" a dangerous question. Two weeks ago I found out that I needed surgery to remove polyps on my vocal cords and the doctor said, "We need to do this now because you are at risk of having permanent voice damage." That started the what if conversations in my head. "What if I have permanent damage to my voice...I talk a lot in my profession." "What if I have to do something else...I want to keep serving God here."

Finally, I spent some time praying and realized that God doesn't live in "what ifs", but deals in the certainty of His sovereignty. God is in control and loves me and wants me to live faithfully. God doesn't need me. He has grown Orchard Church to a place that needs me. God loves me and wants me to live faithfully. Hebrews 11:1-2 says "Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.2 Through their faith, the people in days of old earned a good reputation." "What ifs" deal in things we cannot see and every time we try to process them apart from faith, we miss out on what God really wants for us. But when we turn our "what ifs" over to God and say, "You are in control, God, I want what you have for me", then we live in faith, in hope of the results we cannot yet see.

So this month, while I have been struggling to deal with the "what ifs" of finances and vocal health, I am learning to trust God deeper. Last week, before surgery, I talked with God and said, "God, I do not need my strong voice if you allow it to go away...I need to serve you. I do not need to be a pastor who speaks all the time to find value, I have value in you. My life is not about what I do or have that defines me...my life is to glorify God, no ifs, ands, or buts." God is teaching me faith this month in the noise of my mind and the quiet of my voice. I do not want to worry about what I cannot see, but instead trust and hope for the things that God can see.

PS - I think my voice is going to respond well to surgery, but I am thankful that God has given me this opportunity to dialogue with Him about faith, value and trust.

My Voice - I want to be a Billionaire

It's been a quiet day, so here's what has been running through my noisy head...

This summer, I have been driving around our Wilderness Experience teens in the 15 passenger van. Each time, we drive out of the Air-1 radio coverage and end up on a top 40 station. On these stations, there are only about 4 songs that get played repetitively. One of these songs is called Billionaire and states, "I want to be a billionaire, so fricking bad." The song goes on to discuss all the tings that the singer would do with his new found fortune, like play basketball with Obama, be on magazines with Oprah and feed the hungry. You might be wondering why I am thinking about this song and I'll give you two reasons: 1. I've heard it 50 times in two weeks and it's so frickin bad, and 2. my devotional time this morning happened to have me reading Luke 18 about the Rich Young ruler who departs Jesus without following because it would cost him his "billions".

Jesus asks this man, who is clearly a "good, successful man" to leave his fortune for the poor and follow. The Bible says that the man left sad at Jesus' request. Today, as I read that, I thought of all the things that Jesus asks us to leave behind to follow him. Here is my list to date (abbreviated): My career choice, my financial security, my cynicism of the ministry, my fear of the broken, my past successes and failures (my, my, my...). Following means an abandonment of "my billions" for the passions of Jesus. For over a year of my life, I walked away from Jesus sad, afraid and unwilling of the cost. Finally a day came when I said, "yes, I will follow with nothing but my life." What a great day!

The other thing that hit me is like in the "billionaire" song, I used to think, if God let me keep all of my stuff, I'll do good things with that. But then it's all about me and it misses letting God do the things He wants to do in me and through me. The "Billionaire" lyrics talk of the good he will do with his billions, but what has he been doing with his "hundreds". That has struck me...why ask God to bless us with more when we struggle to be "philanthropic" (thanks, Ron) with the things we have today...our limited finances, our attitudes, our words and our actions. I want to be faithful with what God has provided me and not worry about what I would do with more. I don't want to miss the opportunity of today to be where Jesus wants me, waiting for planets to align, for more money to come or for risk to be removed. I want to be with Jesus today and use whatever He has given me. I want to follow Jesus, so frickin' bad!!

My Voice - Live Like the Redeemed

As most of you know, last week I had vocal cord surgery and have another one scheduled for a couple week's Today is my fifth day of total vocal silence in a week and I am actually enjoying it. The problem is that my brain gets louder the more my mouth is quiet. I need an outlet, so for the next six weeks, I am going to blog on my vocal rest days.

Yesterday was an amazing day at church and all I did was sit there and worship (a new thing for me). Ron Stubbs did an amazing job of teaching Ephesians 4 and all night I have been thinking about putting on the clothes of Godliness and being philanthropic with my words. The songs we great too. Fritz Robinson led a team of Billi, Rick and Annie and they did great songs that moved my heart to desire God.

One of the songs we sang is called "We the Redeemed" by Hillsong United. Here is the chorus:

This is the sound of the redeemed
Rising up to praise the King
Our hope is in You
This is the sound of the redeemed
Rising up to praise the King
Singing glorious glorious One You have saved us
Honor and Power and Praise to the Savior.
You are the Answer You are the Answer!

All day, even during church, I have been thinking about this song and the idea of being "We, the Redeemed." To redeem means to buy back. To be redeemed means that you have "been bought back". We were people dead in our sin, destined for hell, separated from God, and then, we were redeemed, bought back by the love of Christ on the Cross. Think of yourself as a former slave, with no hope of future, no chance of surviving and asking "what is the answer to my perilous condition". Then, the King, comes and says, "You are free. I have bought your freedom once and for all. You belong to me, to live as a child of the King." That has to change us...we are no longer slaves, we are eternal royalty, bought into the family by the Creator.

Understanding that We are the Redeemed should change the way we live, the way we act and treat others. We have been saved from slavery and not freed into poverty to make our own way, but instead given the name of the King. Living like the Redeemed means choosing to pursue being more and more like the Answer, Jesus. Living with His attitudes, His attire, living like a freed member of the royal family. When We live like the Redeemed, our lives and the lives of our community will change. People will see Jesus is the answer by the way we live as God's redeemed.